In foot reflexology, the parts of the foot correspond to body organs. This is an analysis of the current state of Paris Hilton’s feet:
1. Her toes reflect what’s going on in her head. When a
noun, “head” follows “air.” Also a verb.
2. The heel end of her foot relates to her Sexual Organs.
Tilted, due to wearing 3-inch spike high heel shoes
worn dancing, clubbing, starring in X-rated videos and
running towards paparazzi.
3. The heel corresponds to the Knees – see “head” a verb.
Traces of athlete’s foot visible due to contact sports
with various hunks and cute jocks.
4. Her Sole reveals the state of her Stomach and
Pancreas. Her stomach is shriveled due to years of ditzy
model diets. Pancreas is flooded with Splenda and a
natural sweetness associated with a challenged I.Q.
5. The Balls of her feet tells us what’s happening in the Lungs. Weak from
weed, likely unable to blow up a balloon.
6. The Center of the foot relates to the Heart. Her heart is big as a
ballroom in a 5 Star Hotel, but wide open as a Bentley convertible.
7. The Lower Middle of the feet reflect the Large Intestine. It is often
8. The Inside Edge of the foot reveals the Kidney. Her kidneys are
saturated with Perrier, Evian, Pellegrino, Grey Goose.
9. The Outside Edges of the feet are directly linked to the Liver. It is
stressed from drinking green apple martinis at Sunset Strip clubs,
doing cocaine with sleazy boyfriends in Vegas and, of course, from
numerous bookings at city jails.
10. The Big Toe corresponds to the Nose. Bunions indicate
heightened olfactory sensitivity, can smell publicity a mile off.
(Images: novadetox.co.uk, The Bookish Dilettante, funnymations)