Paris Hilton’s Foot Reflexology Chart

30 Aug

In foot reflexology, the parts of the foot correspond to body organs. This is an analysis of the current state of Paris Hilton’s feet:

1. Her toes reflect what’s going on in her head. When a
noun, “head” follows “air.” Also a verb.

2. The heel end of her foot relates to her Sexual Organs.
Tilted, due to wearing 3-inch spike high heel shoes
worn dancing, clubbing, starring in X-rated videos and
running towards paparazzi.

3. The heel corresponds to the Knees – see “head” a verb.
Traces of athlete’s foot visible due to contact sports
with various hunks and cute jocks.

4. Her Sole reveals the state of her Stomach and
Pancreas. Her stomach is shriveled due to years of ditzy
model diets. Pancreas is flooded with Splenda and a
natural sweetness associated with a challenged I.Q.

5. The Balls of her feet tells us what’s happening in the Lungs. Weak from
weed, likely unable to blow up a balloon.

6. The Center of the foot relates to the Heart. Her heart is big as a
ballroom in a 5 Star Hotel, but wide open as a Bentley convertible.

7. The Lower Middle of the feet reflect the Large Intestine. It is often
quite full.

8. The Inside Edge of the foot reveals the Kidney. Her kidneys are
saturated with Perrier, Evian, Pellegrino, Grey Goose.

9. The Outside Edges of the feet are directly linked to the Liver. It is
stressed from drinking green apple martinis at Sunset Strip clubs,
doing cocaine with sleazy boyfriends in Vegas and, of course, from
numerous bookings at city jails.

10. The Big Toe corresponds to the Nose. Bunions indicate
heightened olfactory sensitivity, can smell publicity a mile off.

(Images: novadetox.co.uk, The Bookish Dilettante, funnymations)

Footsies

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7 Responses to “Paris Hilton’s Foot Reflexology Chart”

  1. Dawn@LightenUp! June 3, 2011 at 12:55 pm #

    HahaBarb! Head as a verb! You’re a stitch.

  2. Jules September 15, 2011 at 11:00 pm #

    Love your twisted sense of humor…keep them coming!

  3. Redmond Reflexology October 6, 2011 at 10:18 am #

    YIKES! I hope this doesn’t become a trend – foot reading to the stars!
    As a reflexologist, I’ve always been heartend by references made to the “maps” – feet, hands and ears, that is.
    I must say, however, when used for humorous purposes, I have to chuckle right along side you 🙂 Thanks for a good laugh, but now I must get back to the serious business of REAL reflexology – I hope you understand.

    Wayne Nelson
    Redmond Reflexology

  4. Sharon November 1, 2011 at 8:39 am #

    Hilarious! Great job, Barb.

    • Joanie January 31, 2012 at 6:40 am #

      I wonder if the mish-mosh diagram of her foot is any indication of her mental state.

      • BARB BEST January 31, 2012 at 1:14 pm #

        I suspect that may be the case.

Trackbacks/Pingbacks

  1. The Wonders of Reflexology – Paris Hilton and #39;s Foot Reflexology Chart « Barbs Blast – How to Give a Reflexology Massage : Using the Reflexology Foot … – and more « Reflexology - October 13, 2010

    […] Paris Hilton”s Foot Reflexology Chart. 30 Aug. In foot reflexology, the parts of the foot correspond to body organs. This is an analysis of the current state of Paris Hilton”s feet: 1. Her toes reflect what”s going on in her head. … visit. […]

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