Tag Archives: Romance

What Women Want

5 Feb

Gunfire is illegal, so here’s a poem in celebration of Valentine’s Day.

 

WHAT DO WOMEN WANT?

What do women want, dude?

I’ll tell you!

Kill the black widow spider

Smash the horse fly

Wrestle that ’gator in yonder lake

Slice the venom-spitting snake.

 

Pulverize the prowler

In one Superman swoop,

No spurting blood

No cracking bones

Do it nice, don’t tell me how

No messes, but do it now.

 

What do women want, dude?

I’ll tell you!

Purr like a kitten, tiger

Dance the Howdy Doody

Rock ‘n Roll me with violins,

Shower me with mortal sins.

 

Sail me love letters

In my alphabet soup

Stir it hard,

Use your imagination,

Be a prince, show some stately grace,

Valentine me with diamonds and lace.

 

What do women want, dude?

Most of all?

At least try to enthrall,

A dozen red roses, pricks and all.

Available on Amazon as a paperback and an eBook http://amzn.to/tgOu8b

©2012, Barb Best and Barb’s Blast Humor Blog. All rights reserved.

Direct questions regarding permissions: barbsblast@gmail.com

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My Funny Valentine

24 Jan

Guess what?  Only 3 weeks to go…  will you be my funny valentine?

The reviews are rolling in…

GRADY HARP, Hall of Fame Reviewer, says:

“One of those `must have’ books not only because it is terrific reading but also because it has a lot to say about contemporary relationships. Kudos to a crew of writers who are very in the know about love and relationships. This is a little treasure of a book with some of the most terse humor being written today!”

“a fun read by 40 of the funniest writers in America”

“a little treasure of a book”

“hilarious bits by Barb Best”

A fresh and funny gift for “Love Day” – goes great with chocolate, flowers, hugs, kisses, diamonds, cars, gulf stream jets, Malibu beach houses, sock puppets!

Paperback and eBook on sale at Amazon and Barnes & Noble.

 

Barb Best

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